Do you ever get exhausted from talking?
When you’re on the phone with your friend, do you ever feel like you’re doing too much of the talking?
Talking is how we express our thoughts. Sometimes we don’t even think, we just speak. Imagine living in a world with no one to talk to, pretty sad right? Of course, it’s good to activate your vocals on a regular basis but you should think about living a more quiet life.
What do you have to lose?
If you have a reputation for being somebody who talks a lot, surprise people for a week and keep some thoughts to yourself. Speaking can be unnecessary at times and it could also make other people feel left out.
I used to have a bad habit of cutting people off when they were speaking to me. If an idea popped up into my head while they were saying something I would immediately disregard the manners that I’ve been taught and begin a sentence that was more than likely to be unnecessary.
With practice and patience, I learned to hold in some of the random thoughts that I was having and learned to listen. Everyone likes somebody who is willing to listen to them. You’ll become somebody who everyone will go to if you work on being an active listener.
Being naturally quiet can be good and bad. It’s good when somebody may be trying to start an argument with you but you know yelling back wouldn’t be the best solution. It’s bad when a group of people you find to be interesting are having a conversation and you feel left out.
Living a quiet life has its pros and cons but when applied correctly it can help make your life more peaceful and worth living. The most silent part of the day is waking up before the sun rises, not only is everyone in your house still asleep but the whole world is asleep as well.
Being an Observer Helps You Make Peace With People
You don’t have to be a stalker in order to be someone who observes people. Whether you’re cooped up inside of the house with close ones or out of the house running some errands, you have been exposed to the art of observing.
When it comes to people who you see every day, you may become less aware of those person’s actions over time but there is always an opportunity to learn more about that person without saying a word. Do this with a nonjudgmental mindset, remind yourself that you’re not perfect and that you make mistakes as well.
It’s funny how sometimes you know what somebody is going to do or you have an idea. Isn’t it crazy when that person does something totally opposite? You may have thought you knew that person more than right before that moment.
Always have an open mind when observing people from afar, they’re human just like you. Once you start to observe somebody’s actions for a long period of time you start to understand how that person acts and why. This is important when building relationships as well, if your friend or partner isn’t in a good mood, you should be aware of the possible reasons why so that you’re able to cope and help them feel better.
Why do we do weird things as human beings?
Well, because we’re human. Once you embrace your weirdness it will become a lot easier for you to look past other people's weird actions. Everyone is different so it is important that you observe every human being without skepticism. This is a simple way to make the relationships you have with other people more peaceful.
Thinking Before Speaking
What if every conversation that you had from now on was like a job interview?
You shouldn't have to rush an answer when somebody asks you a question as if you were in an interview, but it’s something to think about. Some of the world’s most brilliant and creative people never feel forced to say something that they don’t mean. You may see some of your favorite celebrities take a brief pause before answering a question that either struck them emotionally or by surprise.
An example of this is when Keanu Reeves took almost a 10-second long pause to think before answering a question that was asked from the media at a red carpet event.
When you start living your life in more silence, every question that is asked to you becomes more important than the last one. When answering questions you may feel like your answer needs to be 100% honest, as it should be. Many times when answering a question we will try to think of an answer within a second of it being asked or even while the question is still being asked.
Being a quiet person gives you more time to think, it gives you more time to observe your thoughts, that way you know which thoughts should be put out into the world and which ones shouldn’t.
You want your voice to meaningful, not only to impress the person you’re talking to but to also make yourself not feel guilty.
Nothing is more refreshing than meeting somebody who is brutally honest with themselves and other people. When your honest, you’re free from having to remember a potential lie or made-up answer.
In this quiet lifestyle, you will learn to choose your words more wisely.
Realizing That the World Is Quieter Than You Thought
Waking up early is good for many reasons but the one reason that gets overlooked is the silence that one experiences at this time of the day. The current world that you live in may be loud and even annoying at times. When you start to live a quieter life, the world around you also becomes quieter as well.
When you’re focused on something that has your full attention, all of the background noise and distractions go away for a few minutes. Your attention span is a measure of how long you can make your own silence.
I typically experience this silence when I’m reading. No matter if my parents are on the phone or the t.v. is left on a loud volume, I don't hear anything else but the words being repeated in my head for the moment. This can be accomplished by engaging in optimal experience better known as “flow.”
When engaging in this state, you’re so immersed in whatever you’re doing that everything else around you goes blank except for what you have your focus on.
You can’t be an overly talkative person when trying to get into the flow state. It’s going to require some silence, everytime you notice that things are getting quiet for a second during the day, remind yourself that you need more of it and also challenge yourself to stay silent at that moment too.
Eventually, you will have a chance to get your thoughts out but you should be focused on enjoying silence whenever it is present. Working in quiet environments can also help you apply the flow state a lot easier for your studies than if you were in a place full of people talking.
You won’t be bothered as easily when you live in silence, you will come to realize that quietness will not last forever so you become more accepting when someone may bother you or try to get your attention.
A secret skill that you will also develop when embracing your quiet lifestyle is developing an ear for small noises. Things like the air conditioning running through your house or birds cheeping outside in the distance from blocks away.
If you want more peace in your life, start living a more quiet lifestyle. Make the adjustments that you need to and practice talking only when necessary. I’ll leave you with a quote from Chaim Potok that says
“I’ve begun to realize that you can listen to silence and learn from it. It has a quality and a dimension all its own.”