Sometimes Being Calm Isn't an Option

Anxiety makes us do the unthinkable

Unfortunately, anxiety comes in waves and you never see when it’s going to take over your life. This can last for days, weeks, and even months but knowing that these feelings come in waves lets you know that it won’t last forever.

There are many ways to get rid of your anxiety but they don’t always work, there are many ways to cope with anxiety but those don't always work either. Sometimes your anxiety gets so bad that you can’t control how you feel. You try to use your affirmations and different techniques that have helped you in the past but they don't work this time.

You tell yourself to “stay calm” over and over again but it’s just making things even worse. This is where your life starts to turn dark, you have the option to unleash whatever is bothering you out into your actions or you can do some of the things we’re going to talk about later on in the article.

Panic attacks are a result of anxiety and sometimes they happen at the worst times. They can happen when you’re out running errands, when you’re at work, or even when you’re out getting something to eat with a friend. Despite how anxiety may make you feel, you’re in control of your thoughts and your actions.

You may feel like you’re not but you’re stronger than you think. Even just saying the word “anxiety” can make you nervous and at the end of the day it’s just a word but that word has such a negative impact on people’s everyday lives.

Eventually, it’ll go away but what are you going to do when it comes back to haunt you? If you really feel like you can’t control what’s going on in your head and in your body when it comes to anxiety then you may want to seek professional help.

Open your mind to trying therapy and don’t close it off as something that is a waste of money. You will get to a point where nothing is working and you will become desperate, try having a one on one session with someone that can potentially help you change your life.

Let Your Anger Out Alone

Like I said above, anxiety usually causes a lot of anger within ourselves. We’re not necessarily mad at anyone in particular but we’re mostly mad at ourselves. Before you think you’re going to have a panic attack or go on a rage, you need to at the very least make sure you’re alone.

I know this sounds kind of scary to do but having people around you when this is happening can actually be very dangerous and make you feel like you’re crazy. I remember back when I was living on campus at my college, I was dealing with a lot of anxiety and I sometimes couldn't control my panic attacks.

They would happen when I was in class or when I was in the library trying to do my homework. People would look at me and it caused me to feel even worse about myself.

If you don't have someone you can go to immediately when this is happening then you need to go into a quiet environment where noise won’t aggravate you even more. Quiet environments will help you think more clearly about what’s actually going on.

You may feel a panic attack starting to come on but when you can listen to your thoughts without any distractions you will realize that what you were thinking about wasn't so bad after all. If you need to yell out of frustration, make sure you're alone in your car or in your room where nobody will be scared.

You have to think about others when in a situation like this because they don’t deserve to deal with your problems. You’re also able to calm down a lot faster when you’re alone because you can stay in the environment you’re in, you don’t have to rush out of there after going through your emotions.

Remember to never take your frustration out on others, this is putting bad energy out into the world which ultimately causes bad energy to come back to you.

Write Out Your Thoughts Immediatley

In many of my past articles about anxiety, I’ve always recommended that you should have some type of journal on you for situations where you’re anxious. My recommendation doesn't change, you won't always have someone to talk to when you’re dealing with anxiety, it’s best in this situation that you write out your thoughts.

You’ll be able to see what’s really on your mind and you can look at those problems from a different perspective. Using a phone to do this won’t give you the same satisfaction as pen and paper will. You’re actually putting in effort when writing on paper and you will appreciate that effort, even more, when you start to feel better.

This is something you’re going to have to try for yourself to really see how beneficial it is. Look at the number of journals from famous authors that have been published as best-selling books.

Ancient Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius had a journal during his time alive that showed the different thoughts he would have to himself while being one of the most powerful men in the world.

His journaling helped him to remain calm in very stressful times of wars and plagues taking over his country. Being anxious is not anything out of the ordinary, you probably talk to someone every day who is dealing with anxiety.

Everyone is just trying to cope the best way they can and it takes time to really know yourself. There’s no defeating anxiety for good but there are ways to cope with it until that wave is gone.

Don't look for a permanent fix, you’re human and you have emotions. Going through anxious times doesn’t only make you stronger but it makes you a lot wiser as well.

Make journaling a priority, try to journal at least once a day where you have some free time. Treat it as if it was your job and you got paid for it. If you’re anything like me, you might end up falling in love with the act of writing and turn it into something that can be used to help people who are dealing with similar problems as you.

Photo by Florian Klauer on Unsplash

Forgive Yourself

It’s normal to be stressed, anxious, and angry at times. No one likes to be put in those positions but they do happen. When you’re able to forgive yourself for having certain reactions, you’ll feel better about yourself and you’ll be more willing to make a change.

Forgiving yourself is a good habit to build and not too many people recommend building this habit for some reason. It will not only help you when you’re anxious but it will help you when you fail too.

Failure is inevitable and it happens to everyone. Of course, you want to avoid failure as much as possible but accept that it happens. It puts less pressure on you to be perfect.

When you’re in the moment of having a panic attack or when you’re really angry about a mistake you’ve made, remember that you will get over it eventually. This is another calming reminder I tell myself when my emotions take a turn for the worse.

When you can’t be calm remember that it will all be over eventually. You get to choose how you will react to the next obstacle that comes into your life. I’ll leave you with a quote from Charles R. Swindoll that says

“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.”

A young adult who’s writing is geared towards self-improvement and self care. “We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect.”

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store