Why Random Conversations Are the Best

Not every conversation you have needs to be planned

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

How many conversations do you have in a day? Probably more than you can count, being in the conversation is normal. Humans are social creatures and we need to start using that to the best of our abilities. Think about how many businesses were started just by conversation.

It doesn’t really take much effort to make conversation with anyone, it comes naturally for us. For my shy people out there it’s ok to not be the one to initiate a conversation, but it’s a skill that you should look getting into. Talking with people can create so many opportunities whether it’s for finding a new business partner, finding a romantic partner to spend the rest of your life with, or even finding directions to a popular restaurant in your city.

The ability to be able to talk to each other without any law being in place is a gift that we tend to overlook. As common as normal conversations are, there's a type of conversation that many people don’t really give enough energy to, which is random conversations.

These are the best discussions to have because let's be honest, small talk isn’t the most enjoyable thing in the world. Even though most random conversations are started by small talk, we need to know when to make the conversation better and when to let it go. It’s common courtesy to create small talk, this goes for situations where you’re in an elevator with one other person or when you’re in line at the grocery store.

We usually use small talk to avoid awkwardness between someone else but all it does is usually make things even more awkward. Going into a conversation without needing to feel knowledgeable about any topic is a good feeling. It helps us to be ourselves and show our true colors and display what we’re truly thinking. We need to have more random conversations so that we can build our social skills for the future.

Both people learn from the conversation

What’s good about having random talks is that there’s not one person giving a lecture during the whole time. Both people are involved and are willing to share their opinions. This doesn’t happen enough in regular conversation. When going to work, you may be asked the same question every single day which is “How are you?”

It’s become so common now that it’s hard to even appreciate the question but that’s just an easy question that breaks the ice between us humans. It’s not something that we necessarily like to say but it just comes out, something that we call “manners.”

Once in every blue moon, you will find someone who will take that question to heart and will really tell you in detail how they’ve been feeling. Although this is a beautiful thing to witness, many of us were not expecting that full answer at that moment. Which really tends to overwhelm us as the person who asked this question.

We would like to know more about you through a more civil way of conversing or even through a random conversation. When we ask this question to each other of “how are you doing?” we just want to make sure that you say “good.” Not the most thoughtful thing that we should expect but it gets the job done.

Strive to have more random conversations with people you see every day and don’t let them pressure you into that common question. Instead, ask them something that you’ve always noticed about them and or something that they’ve mentioned to you before.

They usually put you in a good mood

Another thing that’s good about having random conversations is that you usually get to talk about topics you don’t usually get to talk about. In everyday conversation we say the same things and talk about the topics that society has made us talk about for years, but what about the topics that we’re always thinking about?

No matter how awkward the idea may be, we should still have an opportunity to share these ideas with the people around us. You don’t have to blurt out whatever it is that you’re thinking but you can slowly ease your way into it. One way of doing this is to ask that person you’re talking to how they feel about something related to the topic you’re thinking of.

An example of this can be having the idea of why NBA players get paid so much compared to other sports. Instead of just this one thing out loud, you can ask the person next to you, “Do you watch basketball?” From there it makes it much easier to get into the topic that you want to get into. Most of the random conversations that you do have a very comedic tone when taking action.

If you’re someone who doesn’t have a lot of random discussions because you think they’re unproductive then you may want to consider how much you will laugh when having them. Having a laugh isn’t a bad thing it’s something that allows us to be happy for the moment. Who doesn’t enjoy a good laugh?

People can relate to each other by laughing, although everyone’s sense of humor may be different, random conversations allow us to be our true selves and show our funny side.

Being able to relate to someone off of a random conversation is something that we should really look forward to when we feel like we haven’t socialized enough for the day. Even if you’re someone who doesn’t like to get into a conversation that much, make an effort to have at least one random conversation a day and see where it takes you.

You can have them with friends or strangers

The topics that you have in a random talk can lead to you developing a closer bond with that person you’ve just met or that you’ve known for years. Random conversations are essential for relationships, it’s what helps them grow and stay lighthearted.

The vibe between two people in a conversation remains light, it helps both people to be relaxed and in tune with each other’s mind. Every word that comes out has the attention of others in the conversation.

Think about when you were in school versus when you were talking to your friend about something arbitrary. Which setting had your attention more?

What’s also great about these irregular conversations is that they can happen at any time whether you’re out running some errands or when you’re visiting your family for the first time in years. Conversations like these will happen, there’s nothing that you need to do in order to make them happen, they come when they want and when they should. Start having more of these conversations when you’re out in public and you’ll be surprised by the number of new people you meet and click with.

It’s nice to be able to relate to strangers and friends without having to force anything. Both groups of people will be happy to have these conversations with you and they don’t mind having them either. Learn how to use random conversations to your advantage you will realize why they are the best conversations to have.

Random conversations make the world go round, they are common all across the world. Do yourself a favor and let more of these conversations come naturally and don’t try to stop them from happening either. I’ll leave you with a quote from Zach Braff that says

“It’s all about being a part of something in the community, socializing with people who share interests and coming together to help improve the world we live in.”

A young adult who’s writing is geared towards self-improvement and self care. “We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect.”

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